Monday, January 31, 2011

A History of Mt. Lebanon Revisited

Our charming township was discovered by the inimitable Colonel Thaddeus Lebanon III on an expedition to find attractive real estate. On February 1st, 1722, the daring Col. Thaddeus planted his flag near Lord Shannon's Castle. Conflict sprang up almost immediately, and the settlers fought off several revolts, first from the militant Sisters of St. Clair.

An alliance with Lord Shannon proved timely, though, as the castle fortress repelled hordes of barbarians from the north, led by the Baron von Dormont.

After the victory, Lord Shannon named a marketplace in his dominion "Ye Olde Lebanon Shoppes". Col. Thaddeus Lebanon III was outraged by this appropriation, and the alliance fell.

Luckily, the Sisters of St. Clair were weakened after a long, losing battle against Sir Peter of Ryanhomes along their southern border. They could not muster the forces to attack the Colonel.

Colonel Lebanon then brokered a wide-ranging peace deal in which St. Clair ceded her Lower Kingdom to the ragtag tribal settlement known as Bethel Village.

With a lasting peace achieved and superior resources at his disposal, Col. Thaddeus Lebanon III set about constructing a palace overlooking his kingdom (now the Municipal Building) and enacting his famous 3-step plan for civic progress. These philosophies are detailed in the brilliant treatise "Schools, Realtors®, and Coffee Shoppes: This Towne Shall Hath Glory".